Sunday, December 17, 2017

Good-bye My Love

A week ago, Friday, my sweet husband, Dave, took his last breath and passed away.  He was not only a wonderful husband but my soul mate, clay mate and best friend.

For the more than 30 years we have been married, we have done so much together -- we have worked side by side, traveled and just enjoyed life.  As Dave has said, "we have laughed, loved, cried -- but mostly we have laughed."


He was my biggest fan and supporter in most everything I did.  He appreciated the clay mainly through me but later decided to play with it a bit too.  He mainly preferred to just help whenever I needed it -- no matter what the task.

Dave playing with mica powders
Our largest project we would work on together was making lots of salmon beads for the huge salmon festival.  There is a large spawning ground for the Sockeye Salmon where we live and every forth year is the "dominant" run where there are the largest amount of salmon that arrive to spawn.  There are thousands of tourists and school groups that come to see this wonder in nature.

We would sit side by side making hundreds of beads while talking and listening to music or watching our favorite TV shows.  It was sometimes a bit tedious making so many salmon but doing it together made it more enjoyable.




Dave's favorite task with the clay was buffing our clay beads and pieces with the Dremel tool.  He said it was relaxing and loved seeing the clay go from a matte finish to gloss and almost glass-like shine.

Dave teaching how to polish the clay with a dremel tool
Dave was loved by so many and everyone says how they will always remember his great smile!  He was always so positive and looked at the glass half full side of things.  This never changed even after he became very ill and discovered his kidneys had failed.  He was on dialysis for nearly 17 years, with a year and a half break in the middle when he received a kidney transplant.  The new kidney eventually rejected and failed meaning he was to go back on dialysis for the remainder of his life.


We were fortunate for him to have his own dialysis machine at home.  Here in Canada everything is provided by our health care system including the training involved.  They actually encourage it, whenever it is possible, as it is more cost effective and saves the government thousands of dollars each year verses going to a dialysis unit and have the nurses and techs do everything for you.  Having his own machine at home was not only convenient, but gave him more independance and allowed him to have more control over his health and life.

I am so glad for all those extra years we had together.  Dave use to say he was living in "over-time" and he would keep on going as long as I still loved and needed him!

Well after spending several weeks in the hospital, his body could not take anymore and was worn out.  I will miss him dearly but it gives me peace knowing he is not suffering any more.


Next week will be the hardest with Christmas day and would have been our 31st wedding anniversary.  I have plenty of good memories and would not trade those for anything.

So good-bye my love.  I will miss you so much, but you are still in my heart and I will always love you!

20 comments:

BethAnne said...

I am so sorry for the loss of the love of your life. It is so wonderful to have all of the happy memories of your life together. Wishing you peace, comfort and joy during this difficult time for you.

Kay Burns said...

I am so sorry to hear of your loss Carolyn my thoughts and prayers are with you from Ireland God Bless Kay

Cat said...

I'm so sorry for your loss.
I have been on dialysis for years myself before I got a kidney (for which I am so grateful), so I know the toll it can take on a body.
My thoughts are with you.

Laurie Fancy said...

So, so sorry to hear of Dave's passing. My husband was a kidney donor several years ago, but like your husband, our friend's body didn't accept the kidney either. I pray that you find solace in this holiday season. Take care, Carolyn.

Betty Bickford said...

My heart aches for you. You are in my prayers.

Mihaela Georgescu said...

I'm very sorry to hear that. You two made a wonderful team. I always thought of how wonderful it should be to have your husband share your passion for clay. Take care of you! May God give you strength in this difficult moment

Deanne Crim said...

I am so very sorry for your immeasurable loss. Waking up to find this heart wrenching email in my bin has turned my heart to tears...I cannot even imagine losing my beloved husband of 36 years, also my best friend...just imagining it takes my breath away...and I can only imagine your tremendous grief. It is a comfort to know he is no longer suffering, and I am certain, that when you still yourself, you will be able to hear his loving sweet supportive whispers in your heart. I lift you in my prayers for a 'supernatural' Christmas, that is not overwhelmed with sorrow and tears, but mixed with the tenderness and sweet memories and dreams that have filled your life...and that it will somehow be magical and connect you with your beloved husband in a very unexpected and special way!!! With blessings and my hope for GOD to wrap his arms around you and hold you close!!! <3 <3

Barb Alexander said...

I can't imagine the change this will make in your life, Carolyn, but take solace in knowing that Dave's spirit is alive and he'll be hanging around the studio with you. You will feel his presence, I'm sure of it!

Sending warm hugs at this very difficult time. XO

Pansy Potter said...

I am so sorry to hear your soul mate has passed away. Thinking of you in Aotearoa, New Zealand.

Unknown said...

I am very sorry for your loss. You will be in my prayers. May God bless you even more in your time of sadness.

Lindafromnm said...

What a beautiful tribute to your sweet and wonderful soul mate. You will miss him greatly but the precious memories you have will make you smile during the days to come. Though we have never met, my love and heartfelt thoughts are with you in this difficult time. Blessings.

Anonymous said...

My sincerest condolences. I felt I knew both you and Dave through your endless passion for and sharing of Polymer. Blessings.

Debbie said...

Through the years I have been charmed by the connection you and Dave had. Not just Two Good Claymates, but Two Good Mates. Such a wrenching loss, my heart goes out to you. Combined with the emotional weight of the approaching holiday, and anniversary... I wish I could give you a hug. Hold on to those wonderful memories, and take it one day, sometimes one moment at a time.

Beckysuecreations said...

I am so sorry for your loss. I admired how the two of you worked together and shared the love of creating. I wish you great peace and the strength to make it through the year with happy memories of the man you loved and how much he loved you.

pcPolyzine said...

Carolyn - It is sad to hear of Doug's passing. I will pray for his spirit to be blessed and will pray that you can find peace within your grief knowing the great love you two shared.

pcPolyzine said...

I am embarrassed about my post. I typed Doug instead of Dave. I did not mean to be insensitive. I take a lot of medications that cloud my thoughts. I am so sorry for the mistake.

Donna Kolowsky said...

I'm so sad to read this. I have often thought how great it would be to have my soulmate be my claymate when I read your blog. Thank you both for the inspiration you have provided. I hope you find encouragement, warmth and solace from many sources.

Patricia Ghadbane said...

I just got a chance to read my blogs and was moved to tears by your loss. I have been reading your blog for years and it was always you and Dave together against the world. It must be a terrible blow to you but I know you will perservere. Know that there are many people out here in cyber space who wish you well and hope you again find joy and peace.

FarWay Liz said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you and yours during this sorrowful time. It is amazing how so many people carry such heavy burdens with such light and happy hearts. May peace and joy fill your life going forward.

Cara Jane said...

I am so sorry to hear that. Thinking of you and sending plenty of hugs